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How many ways can you say you're broke?

Discussion in 'Find the Funny' started by The Princess of Bozonia, May 11, 2013.

  1. The Princess of Bozonia

    The Princess of Bozonia Administrator Staff Member

    I saw this on another forum and thought it merited transplanting as a clown exercise. How many creative, funny, or punny ways can you convey that you're bankrupt, beggared, bust, penurious, tapped out?

    Some classics:
    "I'm so broke I can't even pay attention."
    "I'm so broke I don't have enough cents to finish this sentence."
    "I’m so broke i eat my cereal with a fork to save milk."
    "My wallet's so flat, I can mail it with a postcard stamp."
     
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  2. The Princess of Bozonia

    The Princess of Bozonia Administrator Staff Member

    "I'm so skint, my surgeon says I'll have to resort to graft." (Useful if you're a politician.)
     
  3. tim

    tim Have red nose, will travel

    You missed the bridge:

    When trumpets flare up
    I keep my hair up
    I just can't make it come down
    Believe me Pappy
    I can't get happy
    Since my ever loving baby left town

    Another version by some friends (who can't entirely remember the lyrics, either.... but it does include the "Three Deuces" pitching in comically at the end):



    Though, really, Kim Gordon's version (in imitation of Ella) is par excellance.



    If we want to add to this lyrically, there is always "Brother Can You Spare a Dime?" Not to mention "Sixteen Tons".... "St. Peter don't you call me cause I can't gto, I sold my soul to the company store."

    I'm wondering, however, how someone might say that s/he is broke without using words.
     
    Last edited: May 12, 2013
  4. Barry Daft (Mr. B. Daft)

    Barry Daft (Mr. B. Daft) Old Bucket Spitter

    Nick Cave, sings all about being penniless in "Brother, My Cup Is Empty".



     
  5. Alex

    Alex ...much nicer in person!!!

    I am a clown.
     
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  6. Grandpa Weatherbie

    Grandpa Weatherbie Well-Known Member

    I'm embarrassed to admit this but I'm financially irresponsible.
     
  7. LuvLee

    LuvLee Well-Known Member

    I'm flat busted.
     
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  8. Grandpa Weatherbie

    Grandpa Weatherbie Well-Known Member

    Is this oxymoron open for discussion?
     
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  9. LuvLee

    LuvLee Well-Known Member

    I'm not so bad off, You might even say my cups running over.
     
    Last edited: May 23, 2013
  10. Grandpa Weatherbie

    Grandpa Weatherbie Well-Known Member

    That's an awfully good example of an oxymoron or is it a paradox...oh well, my cup runneth all over too.
    Psalms 118.23: "The Lord has done this and it is marvelous in our eyes."
     
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  11. LuvLee

    LuvLee Well-Known Member


    I was feeling broke till I read that quote...marvelous any way you look at it.
     
  12. Slushy

    Slushy New Member

    in every language
     

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