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bar jokes

Discussion in 'Political Jokes' started by Gladman, Jan 15, 2012.

  1. Grandpa Weatherbie

    Grandpa Weatherbie Well-Known Member

    Me and you is drinking buddies

    you smile i smile

    you hurt i hurt

    you cry i cry

    you jump off a bridge

    i'm gonna miss ya ol buddy...
  2. Grandpa Weatherbie

    Grandpa Weatherbie Well-Known Member

    A man sitting in a bar accidentally passes gas. A man sitting nearby says "How dare you pass gas before my wife." The gas man replies, "I didn't know she wanted to go first!"
  3. Grandpa Weatherbie

    Grandpa Weatherbie Well-Known Member

    Old man sitting in a bar sipping on a beer.
    In walks a young man with multi-colored spiked hair and sits down next to the old man.
    The old man started staring at the young fellow.
    The young man turns to the old man and asks, "Whats the matter old man, didn't you ever do anything exciting or daring when you were young?"
    The old man said, "Well yes, I did. I once made love to a parrot and I was thinking you might be my son."
  4. Gladman

    Gladman Well-Known Member

    Guy goes to a psychiatrist and says:"I've got problems. Every time I go to bed I think there's somebody under it. I'm scared and I think I'm going crazy.

    "Just put yourself in my hands for one year," said the shrink. Come talk to me three times a week and we should be able to get rid of those fears."

    "How much do you charge?" "Eighty dollars per visit," said the doctor. "I'll sleep on it," said the guy.

    Six months later the psychiatrist met the guy on the street and asked, "Why didn't you come to see me about those fears you were having?"

    "Well, eighty bucks a visit, three times a week for a year, is $12,480. A bartender cured me for $10. I was so happy to have saved all that money that I went and bought me a new pickup truck."

    "is that so?" he said with a bit of an attitude, "And how, may I ask, did a bartender cure you?"

    "He told me to cut the legs off the bed! Ain't nobody under there now."


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